Paradise by the Dashboard Light
by Orange Sodie
Summary: [EC] Just pure fluff, folks. Move along, nothing to see here.


Title: Paradise by the Dashboard Light  
Author: Carolina  
Rating: R  
Spoilers: None  
Author's Notes: I started writing this story a year ago, but I totally forgot I had it in my hard drive. In fact, I had to change all the 'Speeds' into 'Ryans.' But I found it tonight and decided to finish it. Why? Because smut is good. Thanks to the smashinig Mariel for being my ambassador of proper grammar. Oh, and happy birthday, Lourdes!

**Paradise by the Dashboard Light**  
By Carolina

Calleigh Duquesne glanced into every room she came across and hummed some random tune she was pretty sure her brain was making up. The laboratory seemed deserted, and it was eerie to walk through empty rooms that were normally so full of people, of action. But she wasn't surprised.

For the past three weeks they had been working on a particularly hard case - a woman had called 911 to report her son had stopped breathing for no apparent reason. By the time the paramedics made it there, Colin Chase, only five years old, was already dead. Only during his autopsy, Alexx discovered innumerable old bruising and healed fractures. The case became more complicated when a DNA test revealed mother and son were not biologically related, and then turned into a nightmare when even more children were found under the woman's care, none of them related, all abused and malnourished.

It had taken both a physical and emotional toll on the staff, especially on Alexx, who midway through the case had to take some time off to be with her children. Calleigh was glad at least one of them had the opportunity to walk away from the case, even for just a week, because the past 24 days had been so excruciating it felt like every staff member would need a vacation.

But for now, everyone waited anxiously for Horatio to return from the courtroom with the verdict. Some waited patiently, as she found Tyler, Ryan, and Valera playing poker in the A/V lab (apparently using cookies as chips); others not quite so, letting out their frustrations over a violent video game in the break room.

And Calleigh – she just tried to put it out of her mind, tried not to let it get to her core, which became a little easy when she thought about the fact that the abuse was over for the surviving children. Hundreds of phone calls from single couples all over the country had poured into their Social Services office, all interested in adopting the rest of the children. And that made her happy, just knowing that for every evil act that occurred out there, a hundred loving acts followed. The tune in her head changed to a more upbeat song just thinking about the outcome of what began as a nightmare. In a couple of hours, probably less, they would get their verdict, and she had high hopes. This was Horatio, after all. She knew he wouldn't let them down, and she had enough faith in the judicial system to know this woman would pay the price for the crime she committed.

Already, she felt like celebrating. And as she opened the door to the garage her smile turned into a grin when she saw Eric Delko there, leaning into the front end of a car, hood propped open. He was down to a white tee, the dress shirt he had been wearing merely an hour before resting on a chair to the side, and he was closely examining the engine, or the battery or some other part Calleigh couldn't really see from where she stood. Nor could she see his face, but she could imagine his expression without having to see it – eyebrows furrowed in concentration, eyes shining with the prospect of getting to solve a puzzle, biting on his lower lip whenever one of his theories turned out to be wrong. It was almost like another person took over his body for just a few of minutes as the 'playful' Eric took a break. And then, when he figured it all out, the playful Eric came back full force, a big grin on his face, because every milestone reached deserved a big celebration in Eric's world. His enthusiasm was infectious, she knew that first hand.

Calleigh walked up behind him, and his mind must have been wrapped tightly around his current task, because he didn't even feel her standing close, hadn't even heard her approaching steps. Instead, he began to unscrew the radiator cap, completely unaware of her presence. When it became obvious he wouldn't notice her there until he actually saw her, Calleigh wrapped her arms around his waist. His body jumped immediately, his hand dropping the cap somewhere in the gap around the engine and he tried to turn around but Calleigh ducked, albeit unsuccessfully. As soon as he saw a flying strand of blonde hair, his body relaxed and he chuckled.

"What are you doing?" Eric asked, his voice full of amusement. His body leaned into hers slightly, but his eyes remained glued to the engine.

Instead of replying, Calleigh got on her tiptoes and planted a kiss behind his ear, loving the way his body shivered pretty much immediately. It was almost too easy sometimes. "What are _you_ doing?"

He was… confused. A minute ago he was pretty sure he had been inspecting a bad transmission, and now he had Calleigh Duquesne behind him, doing something with her lips that he was pretty sure would cost him his job. Both their jobs, his brain reminded him. His body didn't seem to care much.

"I'm, uh," he hesitated, having a bit of a hard time remembering the alphabet, let alone the worthless minutia of his lunch time, "checking out Ryan's car."

"Why?" she asked without missing a beat, lips traveling down to his neck and settling there, an area she knew too well. His Achilles Heel. His body shivered. She loved having that power over him.

"Because he's cheap and I'm easy," he finally breathed and when she chuckled he tackled the opportunity and turned around, but that didn't seem to throw her off at all, because she immediately began to kiss his neck, her fingers intertwining with his.

"Calleigh," Eric said disapprovingly.

No response.

Eric chuckled tensely. "You're gonna have to stop that."

"Stop what, sweetie?"

Her voice sounded so innocent for a moment Eric _really_ believed she had no idea what he was talking about. But then he remembered this was Calleigh, first lady of the theatre. Oh, she was diabolical.

"You know perfectly well," he said, pushing her hands away like he was wrestling an octopus.

He didn't receive a response that time, either, but didn't have the chance to protest again, because suddenly she was nibbling on his lower lip, her body pressed to his. She disentangled their fingers to sneak her hands under his shirt, slowly running them over his muscles, her nails leaving tiny tremors in their wake. His hands instinctively rested on her buttocks to pull her closer, and Eric didn't know what was more frustrating, that she didn't seem aware of the fact that they were at work, or the fact that his body was responding more intensely than usual _because_ they were at work.

Diabolical.

Suddenly the back of his knees hit the front bumper of the car behind him and he nearly fell into the hood. Her teeth bit on his lower lip and his tongue was on its way into her mouth when he had to practically _force_ himself to stop.

He never thought the day would come when he would have to stop himself from going down on Calleigh Duquesne.

"Someone might walk in, Calleigh," he said, attempting, very reluctantly, to push her away, frustrated because neither Calleigh nor his body were listening to him at the moment.

"Horatio's in court," she replied, her lips on his neck again, alternating between messy kisses and gentle bites.

"Other people work here, too," he added.

She ignored him. Again. Eric closed his eyes and took a couple of deep breaths. Jesus Christ.

"I'm gonna file a sexual harassment suit."

Calleigh finally tore herself away to look at him, an edge and playfulness in her eyes he rarely got to see at work. She let her elbows rest on his shoulders and raised her eyebrows. "Why? Are you sleeping with Horatio, too?"

"Well, you're not always in the mood," Eric joked.

"I'm in the mood now," Calleigh said huskily, pressing her lips to his again.

"Hmm mm," Eric said, his voice muffled, until he broke the kiss. "Can't you wait until the shift is over?"

Calleigh shrugged her shoulders. "I could. But I don't want to."

"Because if you haven't noticed, we're very much in the lab right now."

"We're not in the lab," Calleigh argued.

"Fine, in the garage. We're still at work," Eric said.

Calleigh pulled away to give him the same playful smile she had given him before. "Haven't you ever fantasized about having sex at work?"

"I have," Eric said. "But if you don't stop this we're gonna have to start fantasizing about having sex in line at the unemployment office."

"I'm okay with that," Calleigh said.

And it was that husky voice, mixed with the seductive look, that did him in. His hands grabbed the lapels of her jacket and he pulled her closer, her little laugh indicating that yes, she approved of that. He pressed his lips to hers and bent his knees lightly to deepen the kiss, but even in heels she was way too short. But what she missed in height she made up for with energy and strength, because suddenly he found himself walking... somewhere. He had no idea where she was pushing him, but suddenly his body pinned hers against the side of the car, right on the gas pump, and his hands rested under her thighs to lift her up and deposit her on the trunk.

Calleigh grinned into his mouth and wrapped her legs around his waist, gripping fistfuls of undershirt to pull him closer. Eric opened his eyes and looked around, paranoid that someone might walk in on them, but when he saw no one there he leaned into her, his lips pinching her own, tongue running across one, then the other. She let out a surprise moan and he was pleased about the fact he could beat her at her own game. But her surprise dissolved and she responded quickly, and his entire nervous system went on full alert when her hands began to unbuckle his belt.

"Calleigh, you're not actually—"

"Be _quiet_, Eric," Calleigh groaned, frustration starting to show.

"I'm pretty sure there are cameras in this room," Eric said, looking around.

Calleigh grinned. "Didn't you mention something about making a tape once?"

"Yeah, for us, not for the security guards," Eric said. "I mean, I know they're hard working guys, but—"

"Eric, I didn't come down here to banter with you," Calleigh said, her fingers trying to unbutton his pants.

Eric grinned and kissed her neck, his hands sliding up her thighs. "Why did you come here again? I forget."

"To take advantage of you."

Eric chuckled. "Well, I guess I can't blame you for that," he said cockily. "I know you can barely stand the thought of seeing me clothed, we're all human. But Cal... Ow!"

Calleigh narrowed her eyes at him, her fingers pulling on his ear, hard.

"Don't flatter yourself, Delko. The garage isn't the only room in this place, and I'm sure there are plenty of guys out there who'd be willing to lend me ten minutes of their time," she said sharply.

Eric pushed her hand away and rubbed his ear, frowning. "Name one."

Calleigh rolled her eyes innocently. "Do I have to?"

"Yeah you have to. Tell me who," Eric said sharply.

Calleigh leaned in and kissed him again, her hands creeping under his shirt and drawing circles on his chest. "Alphabetically or randomly."

Eric raised his eyebrows. "Well, now _who's_ flattering herself?"

"It's not flattery, it's a fact," Calleigh said.

"Right," Eric said sarcastically. "You know those guys only want you for your body."

"Uh huh," Calleigh joked. "And you want me for my gun collection?"

Eric chuckled. "No, I want you for your body _and_ your gun collection."

"Funny guy."

Eric smiled again, but then a hint of seriousness appeared on his face. "Name one."

Calleigh rolled her eyes again. "Ryan."

Eric laughed. "Ryan. Is he even legal?"

"I don't need him to be legal, I just need him to do his business," Calleigh said.

"Not threatened at _all_." Eric said, grabbing one of her legs and snaking his hand in through her pant leg to caress her calf slowly. "Name another one. A real one"

"Mmm... Horatio?" Calleigh said.

"Horatio," Eric scoffed. "He'd probably force you to wear those stupid sunglasses the whole time."

"Well, it's not like I plan to look at him," Calleigh said. "Besides, when was the last time he had a woman? All that pent up sexual tension waiting to burst, very hot."

Eric grimaced. "Please don't ever mention the words 'Horatio' and 'sexual' in the same context, and _please_ do _not_ do that little moan when you say his name."

Calleigh chuckled and disentangled her leg from his fingers. Without the use of her hands her shoe came off and she ran her foot up between his legs, to his crotch, getting a little yelp for that. "Why? It doesn't turn you on, does it?"

Eric shuddered, he didn't know if it was due to the thought or the way her foot stroked him through his boxers so meticulously. He grabbed her calf again and massaged the plant of her foot before he rested it against his chest. "Name one."

"Okay." Calleigh smiled devilishly, her foot drawing patterns on her chest. "How about Sam?"

Eric's smile disappeared. "That's low."

Calleigh grinned. "Oh, that one hurts!"

"No, no. I would just expect you to do better than Sam. He's not even that good looking, Calleigh," Eric said.

But Calleigh just smiled; a twinkle in her eyes. "Jealous, are we?"

Eric frowned at her, looking like his feelings were hurt. Not that he didn't trust Calleigh, he just didn't trust Sam. He didn't trust beautiful, strong, virile men in general. And Sam was practically a god. But looking at the playful expression on her face, he smiled and shook his head. "I'm not worried."

"Maybe you should be," Calleigh said huskily, reaching for his shirt again and pulling him close.

"I know my competition," Eric said, deposited a kiss on the nape of her neck, his hands sliding her jacket down her arms.

"You do?"

Eric moved up to kiss her ear. "I also know where you keep it."

Calleigh chuckled, somehow knowing if this was any other guy she'd be embarrassed as hell. But she wasn't. Eric had a way of making her feel comfortable that no other person in the world had or could.

So she kissed his earlobe instead, her hands sliding down towards the zipper of his pants to finish what they started. "Well, at least my vibrator doesn't cry."

Eric grunted. "I told you, the damn condom pinched a hair."

"Okay," Calleigh said, her tone serious, "no more talking."

She smiled and lowered the zipper down, loving the way he closed his eyes in anticipation. Men.

He made some sort of sound Calleigh took as an 'okay' and she let his pants fall to his ankles. She kissed him again, with more urgency, slipping her tongue into his mouth and allowing a moan to linger on the back of her throat as Eric began to unbutton her shirt. When his fingers got to the top he didn't remove the piece of clothing, but rather lowered his head to kiss her collarbone, the nape of her neck. Calleigh arched her body and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, letting her head fall to the side. He kissed her chest, arms toyed with her legs as he worked his way down. She closed her eyes and sighed, his breath on her skin somehow making her feel sexy and erotic and if she didn't have him now she could possibly explode.

She wrapped her legs tighter around him so she wouldn't fall backwards as her hands came up and undid the front clasp of her bra, anticipating Eric's inability to find it. She let it hang open.

Eric gaped in surprise. "You planned this."

Calleigh smiled, pressing her chest against his and kissing his chin. "Coincidence."

"There are no coincidences," Eric said, pushing her back slightly to admire her. Of course it was planned. In his experience, women just didn't go around wearing bras with clasps on the front. Hell, he was sure they'd stopped making those bras years ago. And he wouldn't put it past Calleigh, either, to plan something like this. She was diabolical.

But he would gladly go to hell for his and he didn't hesitate as one of his hands reached up to cup her breast. She closed her eyes, let her head fall back and took a deep breath and good Lord, he loved it when she did that. He loved the deep breath. He loved when he could see it. He was sure it was the sexiest thing in the world.

He pinched one of her nipples as he lowered his head and kissed the other breast, feather touches and hearing her moan. He licked the areola before he bit down, this time getting the deep breath followed by another moan. She rested her hands on the back of his neck, trying to hold on for dear life and get him to do way too many things at the same time. Calleigh was demanding in life and demanding in bed, and their disastrous first night together was proof of that.

But now that he understood her signals better he moved to her other breast and she gasped when he bit it, using a bit more force this time. Her legs squeezed his waist harder and he could _feel_ the heat between them. He quickly realized he had her on top of the gas pump and it felt so hot the whole damn place might explode at any moment but hell, he couldn't choose a better death.

She arched her body towards his again and he let go of her breast to travel upward, his lips capturing her own and the hard way she kissed him told him maybe she really hadn't been joking when she said she'd always fantasized about having sex at work. And Eric, well, he really could take it or leave it, as sex with Calleigh was hot everywhere, but suddenly he found her enthusiasm was making him dizzy, and probably harder than he had been since he was a stupid, horny teenager.

He kissed her cheek and her jaw line, taking care of that spot behind her ear she loved so much and her hands found their way under his shirt again, raking his back as he bit her neck gently.

"Oh, God."

Eric opened his eyes at the sound and pulled back to look down at Calleigh with a frown. Calleigh's signature phrase during sex but it sounded much different this time.

Calleigh looked at him as well, her frown mirroring his own. But then her features softened when she realized the implications behind his 'Oh, God.'

"Aww," she said soothingly, caressing his cheek. "It's okay, honey."

Eric's frown intensified. The hell? "Uh, Cal... that wasn't me."

Her eyes widened at him before she frowned. Eric felt it in his stomach, that dreadful feeling, before he looked up and found Ryan by the door, a look of horror on his face, his body completely immobile.

"Ryan," Eric croaked out and immediately went to put Calleigh's shirt back in place but she had him beat to it. She clasped her bra and buttoned her shirt in record time as Eric looked around for any kind of weapon he could use to off himself.

Oh, God. He _knew_ this would happen. He fucking knew it.

And Ryan just looked like he'd just seen a ghost, his face shocked and expressionless at the same time. He looked like he wanted to run but his legs weren't working at all. Eric couldn't really blame him.

Calleigh cleared her throat and hopped off the car, giving Eric a tiny smile as she turned around and began walking with so much dignity Eric began to wonder if anything had happened at all.

But then he shook his head and couldn't help smiling, either, as he watched her make her way towards the door. Definitely not the reaction he'd expected. But then, he'd found long ago that Calleigh was full of surprises.

"Hi, Ryan," she said cheerfully and whisked past him, back towards the lab. Ryan gave her a weird look as she walked, and when he turned around he found Eric buttoning his pants.

"Uh..." he said, not knowing what to say or how to say it and... was that his car?

"Sorry, man, we just," Eric said, and not knowing how to continue the sentence he stopped there. Dammit, Calleigh was much better at this. He scratched the back of his head, looking around bashfully before he looked at Ryan again. "You won't tell Horatio, right?"

But Ryan was too busy trying to make sense of the situation. He looked down at the floor, like he was trying to work out a complicated math equation in his mind, and his eyebrows were so furrowed his hairline was nearly touching his nose.

"You okay, man?" Eric asked.

Ryan looked up at him, shook his head and that seemed to help him understand the situation a little better. But he still looked like he'd walked in on his parents having sex. Considering the way he followed Calleigh around like a lost puppy, Eric thought, the comparison probably wasn't completely unfounded.

"How long have you two been, uh..." It wasn't what he wanted to ask, exactly, but he wasn't sure he'd be able to formulate a more coherent or relevant question.

Eric let out a small sigh as he looked down, "few months."

Ryan's eyebrows finally settled back into place and his eyes widened. "_Months_?"

"Yeah," Eric said, feeling guilty and why? At least it wasn't Horatio.

Ryan nodded. His face looked normal now, but his mind raced with unwanted thoughts. "O-on my car?"

Eric narrowed his eyes. "No, not on your car."

"Okay," Ryan said, feeling some kind of frustration or anger bubbling inside of him. "Because right now it looked like you were about to f—"

"Okay, okay," Eric said dismissively before Ryan had the change to throw one of his fits. "Do you wanna know what's wrong with your car or not?"

Ryan frowned again, angered. "I know what's wrong with my car. Two people were just about to have sex on it!"

"Would you keep your voice down?" Eric shushed. "I'll show you—"

"No, _don't_... come near me, please," Ryan said, looking away and holding his hand in front of him. "Just... stay over there, where I can't see anything below your belt."

"Okay," Eric said. He swallowed indignantly and moved towards the front end of the car. "Well, your transmission's seen better days; I don't even know how you got here this morning. But, uh, I got a buddy of mine; he can get you one, cheap. Used, but in good shape."

Ryan nodded, but his attention didn't seem to be on Eric or what Eric was saying. "You didn't do anything _inside_ the car, did you?"

Eric rolled his eyes. "Would you let it go already?"

"Let it go?" Ryan exclaimed. "How would you like it if I snuck into your garage tonight and had sex on _your_ car?"

Eric chuckled. "That's cute, Ryan, but maybe you should stick to attainable goals."

"You don't think I can get someone to have sex with me," Ryan said.

Eric raised his eyebrows. "Theoretically, anything could happen. Realistically—"

"Okay, so first you have sex on my car—"

"We didn't actually have sex."

"—and then you insult me?"

"You know, I just changed your oil and filter, and I'm getting you a good deal on a used transmission," Eric said.

"Oh, okay," Ryan said, his tone light but sarcastic. "So I guess I should be _happy_, that you have chosen _my_ car as the main setting of one of your sexual romps with Calleigh?"

Eric sighed. Of course he understood Ryan's frustration. If he walked into the garage and saw Frank going at it with his wife on top of his trunk he'd have a fit himself. But Ryan was a little strange to begin with, a little too much into cleanliness and Eric was sure that was making things worse. And it's not like something happened between him and Calleigh anyway.

Well, maybe something _would've_ happened eventually, but that wasn't the case.

Dammit, there was no way out of this one. He knew something like this would happen. He fucking knew it, just like he knew she would leave him to deal with it. He was gonna make her pay for this.

He fished Ryan's car keys from inside his pockets and heaved them at the young CSI. "Here."

But Ryan took one step to the side and let the keys hit the floor. "I'm not touching those."

Eric shook his head. "You're an idiot."

"Not only am I not touching those keys, I am not going anywhere near the vicinity of that car until you take it to get washed, dried, washed again, carpet cleaned, _and_ deodorized."

"You're being ridiculous," Eric said.

"In fact... you know what? I don't want it."

Eric chuckled. "What?"

"I don't want the car. I don't want it. Sell it, do whatever you want, but I am not driving that thing again," Ryan said.

Eric sighed. "Okay, look, I'm sorry. I guess... we just got a little carried away."

"A _little_?" Ryan exclaimed.

"It won't happen again," Eric said, looking at the young CSI expectantly. "Look, I'll have it washed, I'll vacuum; I'll even paint it a different color, if that helps."

Ryan sighed and looked down at the floor, thinking Eric's proposal over and over again. Horrible images flashed through his mind, or Eric and Calleigh... doing things, desecrating the dignity of his car, his beloved Pete. He was sure he would need therapy after this. He was sure his _car_ would need therapy after this. Ugh.

He looked up at Eric inquisitively. "Are you _sure_ you didn't do anything inside the car?"

Eric gave him a look. "Ryan you can barely fit a cat in there. How are two people going to have sex in your non-existent back seat?"

Ryan frowned, but that seemed to convince him. _Somewhat_.

"Come on, man, I know that if it was you and..." he stopped, going through all the names of the women around the lab and discarding them all promptly. "Well, I'm sure if it was you I'd forgive you."

Ryan frowned. "Are you insinuating I look like the kind of guy who likes to masturbate on other people's cars?"

Eric kinda chuckled. Leave it to Ryan to use proper words like 'masturbate.' "I'll bring it to you tonight."

Ryan sighed. "Fine. But you owe me a favor, Delko. I don't know what it is yet, but it's gonna be huge."

"Yeah, yeah," Eric said dismissively when his cell phone began to ring.

"I'm gonna go burn my eyes with Clorox now," Ryan said, shook his head one more time and disappeared back into the lab.

Eric watched him go, sighed, and picked up his cell phone. "Delko?"

"Ballistics lab. You have 30 seconds."

"Calleigh..."

But she hung up.

Eric huffed and shook his head. No way was he going to play puppet to Calleigh's sexual fantasies. No way. He had a sense of propriety. He was a man. He wore the fucking pants in this relationship. If she wanted to get off at work, well, she would just have to bring her vibrator with her tomorrow.

He went back to inspect Ryan's car when his cell phone rang again. He thought of ignoring it, but he found himself answering it anyway. "Delko."

"14... 13... 12... I'm unbuttoning my shirt... 11... 10..."

Eric grunted at her tone. Why did she have to use that tone? Why did she have to be so fucking sexy and he so fucking pathetic?

'Fight it, man,' a voice told him. 'You're a man. You wear the pants. You wear the fucking pants, dammit.'

But the voice couldn't possibly compete with her sultry tone. Sighing, he closed his cell phone and ran out of the garage towards the ballistics lab.

El Fin!


End file.
